1. New mom Keri Russell "ruining the earth with my diapers.": Jack Nicholas adds this to his 'immediate future' list of things to do.

2. Lily Allen says she wants to retire to a farm: Surprisingly, this is the 2nd most desired wish by Brits, behind orthodontia.

3. Showgirls star Elizabeth Berkley to guest on CSI: Miami: Not really her first appearance, her career played a corpse in season 3.

4. Walt Disney Pictures to release a 3-D dog movie: Internet is abuzz over leaked clip "returns to his own vomit" on You Tube.

5. Jet Li breaks Chinese film salary record: This translates to two-thousand U.S. dollars and 3 toy factories.

6. Several of the surviving Wizard of Oz munchkins on hand to receive star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame: Again, they were upstaged by arrival of Paris Hilton in a limousine and puff of smoke.

7. Jerry Seinfeld's trip to Israel threatens to upstage Mideast peace conference: Michael Richards books flight to Cape Town Apartaid Rally.

8. Jermaine Jackson says a 2008 reunion of the Jackson 5 is in the works-with Michael!: Barely getting in with a 3-2 vote.

9. David Hasselhoff may return as Michael Knight Sr. in Knight Rider relaunch: That is, if he can buy the series, produce the series and cast the series.

10. Journalists fail to recognize Cary Elwes at 20th-anniversary bash for The Princess Bride: Proving, even Saw fans are smarter than journalists.