1. Brad Pitt says hug from crazed fan "tells me that we're vulnerable:" Crazed fan immediately cussed out by Faith Hill.

2. Tori Spelling might star on Broadway in Chicago: If only her father could have lived to see it . . . and secure her the job.

3. Lonestar to release next album exclusively through Cracker Barrell: They'll be placed right between the Pecan Logs and Cymbal-Clapping Monkeys.

4. Shakira taking Intro to Western Civilization at UCLA: Fergie enrolls at USC to take Intro to Music.

5. O.J. allegedly tries to retrieve sports memorabilia at gunpoint: His defense team offers to move Mark Furman to Las Vegas.

6. Tommy Lee retracts resignation from Motley Crue: Which is not the first time Tommy Lee has retracted something.

7. 20 Million fans try for tickets to Zeppelin reunion: They must be opening for Miley Cyrus.

8. L.A. block renamed Larry King Square: I think "Larry King Square" says it all.

9. Ed Burns: "I have to admit, I love most of my films:" Thereby proving he is the antithesis of the human race.

10. Charlie Sheen says he feels like a "leper" next to "handsome" Mario Lopez: Mother Theresa had the same feelings about that "hot" Tiffani Amber Thiessen.